Being human

Hey guys,

Sorry about the small hiatus in blogging. I have been distracted lately. Sometimes doubting my story, which is supposed to be normal. I know, I know, I have been ranting about the same thing for awhile now and I guess you should be sick of reading about it. So let's change the topic for a bit.

Someone was complaining about her breaking up situation to me a few days back and it got me thinking, how someone's opinion can literally change in a matter of a few seconds just because of one poor action he/she makes.

Let's cut the chase. So, this two have been in a long term relationship, approximately 10-12 years. Everything in their relationship was going fine, they even reached the stage where they were both ready to be married to each other. Throughout the years, we would always hear them singing praises about each other. They always held hands in group outings, and were the envy of everyone in terms of relationship wise. They were known to be the perfect couple. I guess, their quarrels turned to be non-existent during the last 4 years of their relationship, maybe they didn't see a point of quarreling because they knew each other inside out by then. Suddenly, the guy messages her out of no where via Whatsapp and says he wants to break up. She got confused. Called him many times, tried waiting to meet him near his home bla bla bla, all the typical desperate measures to talk to someone. All she gets are texts in response. About how he didn't see a point in meeting cause it will only make things worse. All the great things which she had said about him in that 10 years changed only because of the way he chose to break up with her. After she calmed down, she told me she would have accepted the break up and not hated him if he told her face to face or some other way rather than texting her. She felt disrespected, like after all those years the way he chose to leave her was the only thing that she remembers him by.

I can't tell if it's justifiable or not. I mean, shouldn't you be pissed because he broke up with you for no reason, instead of the way he broke up with you? So does that mean if he brought her out for dinner and told her he's done, she would have smiled and remembered him for the rest of her life as the guy who took her out for dinner to break up with her?

Another incident I heard of, was a lawyer who had a relationship with his client. She eventually got pregnant, and he started throwing her off, very slowly. Eventually after 6 months or so she got the drift but it was too late for her to change her mind about whether or not keeping the child was a good idea. This lawyer was already married, and the client was aware of his situation. He made it clear that he was not going to leave his wife for any reason at the beginning when things started to heat up between the both of them. Eventually, after she got fed up of chasing after him, she decided to make a report with the relevant authorities in the legal sector to take action against him for having a solicitor-client affair and he was disbarred. I mean, I fully understand the part about feeling scorned, lover left her once he found out she got pregnant. But firstly, why was she even okay with having an affair in the first place? My point is, if she was so angry, she should have contacted his wife, let her know about the situation and demand some other kind of compensation to look after her child. Why ruin someone else's career when it is something he depends on for a living? There were so many other things she could have done besides totally destroying his career. Then again this is just my opinion. What she was going through when she made her decision to do that, only she will know. For me, her action says a lot about her. P.s: I'm not siding either the lawyer or the client. Both were idiots to get involved with each other anyway.

I personally know of a guy who does a lot of charity work. Volunteering, donating money to various organizations and even used clothings etc. He is a remarkable guy when it comes to charity. There was once we were out with a group of friends and we came across an elderly person who was selling tissue paper. Some girl walked passed us and saw the elderly person trying to coax my friend into buying it from her and this girl just cut in and called him a heartless guy and pulled the elderly person away. I just found it so funny that of all people HE was labelled as a heartless guy just because he had not bought tissue paper, and who knows whether or not he would have bought it. He didn't even have the time to say no, or okay, by the time that "sweetheart" pulled the elderly person away.

It is so difficult to be ourselves. Ironically, in this day and age people are preaching to everyone to be themselves. But how to? When we are judged for every thing that we do. We text, we get judged. We stand up for ourselves, we get judged. We try to do something good, we get judged. We don't do anything, we get judged. Is it that hard to be human these days?

Being human to me is about being kind, loving, truthful amongst many other qualities. But what if you are all of them for your whole life and one wrong move (in someone else's eyes) turns you into the ultimate asshole?

I always believe that the answer to this question is very simple. If an outsider or someone who is your fan on instagram or facebook or whatever else thinks you are an asshole, so be it.

But if your best friend, someone who knows you inside out and has been through the ups and downs with you thinks you are an asshole, then my friend, it's time to reflect and actually give a shit about that comment.

Love,

Naia